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Big bang head on desk repeatedly

Big bang head on desk repeatedly

“Dude, did you check out that episode of The Big Bang Theory? Oh man, it was so funny. Sheldon Cooper is so funny OMG LOL ROFLMAX.”

Yeah, I get this a lot. Every body I know – human, dog and otherwise keeps telling me about how awesome TBBT is and how it’s the ‘funniest show like ever’. Statistically, they say 4 in every 5 people like TBBT. Statistically, they also say that 4 out of 5 statistics are made up. However I don’t need any statistical backing when I say I hate the show. Actually, wait. Let me rephrase that. I don’t hate the big bang theory. I fucking loathe it. I loathe it more than I loathe tacky girls wearing purple velvet slacks with ‘bebe’ written across the buttocks. I mean come on…at least learn how to spell babe.

According to me, one of the main reasons people like TBBT is because of the laugh track. It’s like a comedy 101 for dummies book – it guides you on when to laugh.

“Oh look Sheldon said something unbelievably long, laced with big words AND there’s a laugh track at the end of it so this must be funny HAHAHAHAHA.” 

This leads me to my next point. Why do people love Sheldon exactly? He’s nothing but an insufferable know-it-all whose head I want to badger in with an electron microscope. (For poetic justice, of course.) People say he is one of the greatest characters ever written for television. I say he is nothing but an overgrown man-child who is infuriatingly impossible to live with. Of course, if Sheldon was here right now he would correct me and say that he was not impossible because he existed. He would tell me that the word I was looking for was ‘improbable’. After which I would take a sledgehammer and whack him in the cojones.

I hate Sheldon because he is annoying. And as a viewer, I can’t have somebody this annoying hold the show together. In Arrested Development, the entire family was annoying and stupid – but the protagonist Michael was the sane one. That balanced things out. Here, your most annoying character is running the show, and that’s not good.

The Big Bang theory is mediocre comedy at best, and I’m being way too generous when I say ‘mediocre’. There is one good thing about the show. Penny. Excuse me while I make my way to the bathroom.

Amogh Ranadive is a stand up comic, television writer and generally awesome guy. He is a multi billionaire who gives away luxury cars to his 120 person strong staff. Also, he is delusional. Slightly.

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