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Alternative TV shows we wish existed

Alternative TV shows we wish existed

In a different timeline, we’d have totally tuned in to these.

Nothing suits me like a suit: Barney Stinson in conversation with his suits.

The closet is set, the scotch is poured out, the ties have all gathered. This fall, on NBC, the charming Barney Stinson will have a tête-à-tête with…his suits. Suits! Suits! Suits!

Walk and Talk: Aaron Sorkin’s latest on the commercialization of the walking and talking industry

Walking. To move at a regular and fairly slow pace by lifting and setting down each foot in turn, never having both feet off the ground at once. Talking. To be able to make sounds indicative of human speech. Is this what the founding fathers of America want for us? Where are the morals? Where is our basic ethical instinct? DO big corporations care? Why do the Republicans want us to talk? Do the liberals really care about walking? And what the fuck is wrong with this great nation? Coming soon on HBO.

Walter White: Confessions of a crazy gambler

Known to most as the cook, Walter White, Meth Chef Extraordinaire, lets us know that we had it wrong all along. He was ACTUALLY a gambling addict. No Kidding. Catch it straight from the horse’s mouth. This evening at 8pm. Only on ABC.

Inspector Space Time: Live from Abed’s dreamatorium.

Beep. Beep. Boom. Where reality meets fantasy and the galaxy floats away and the rolling of dice causes time to split. Starring Abed Nadir and Troy Barnes in a cardboard box instead of a telephone booth. The question, constable isn’t where, but when!

Passion Unbridled: Mrs Janet Snakehole and FBI Officer Kurt Mackelan, A daytime soap.

She’s a rich widow with a terrible past. He used to be in the FBI till they fired him. For stealing the presidents rubies. Will they find love? Who burned down the mill? A gripping tale of lust and drama.

Steven Hyde and the case for the hippy uprising: A documentary

Whatever.

Robin Sparkles: A sequel

Let’s go to the mall, I now have money. Let’s go right away, it’s alright honey. She’s as sparkly as ever and she’s back on your screen every Friday at 10! Except this time, she’s older and half American! No you get ‘oat’ of town!

Wealth of Nations, Read aloud by Stringer Bell.

(Slideshow: Visuals of Mr. Bell in various poses, all topless. Audio: Voiceover by Stringer Bell: Excerpts from Wealth of Nations by Adam Smith. Text Visual: “Coming soon.”)

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